Saturday, July 11, 2009

Chip, My Pet Lobster

Well, I'm all alone this week. Becky, the boys, and even Frank have split for a few weeks. They're off to see the grandparents in Wisconsin and Minnesota until practically the end of July. I don't even have a dog to keep me company!

That's not entirely true. I do have Cameron from across the street. This month is shaping up to be a real Dennis The Menace/Mr. Wilson kind of month. At about 9:30 this morning, as I'm firing up the weed whacker, Cameron, our preschool neighbor and one of Luke's friends, scoots on over and asks me where Luke is.

I tell him that Luke is gone for almost the whole month. I further instruct him to go and look at a calendar. "You see, wait until you see August, and then come and ask for Luke."

"I don't have a calendar," he informs me.

"Well, I'm sure your mother does. Ask her."

Undeterred, Cameron runs back home, grabs his collection of live grasshoppers and a lawn chair, plops himself down and proceeds to keep me company while I mow. Now I have a friend. I decide that if he's bored, he might as well help me out, so I hand him a broom, and instruct him to sweep the grass off the driveway. Might as well make himself useful.

Of course, Cameron happily complies. I guess he and I are both pretty lonely.

~~~~~

So, to deter my loneliness, this evening, I decided to head on down to Giant to see if I could buy myself a friend. After much deliberation, I decided on a nice one-and-a-half pound lobster that I named "Chip".

I brought Chip home, and we played, and wrestled, and cuddled, but Chip seemed to want to pinch me all the time, so he wasn't a very good cuddler. At least not like Frank.

Finally, it got to be about 6:30, and I was getting hungry. I began to wonder if Chip might be pretty good eatin'. It was about this time that the doorbell rang. (And rang, and rang!)

DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG!

I ran to the door, with Chip in hand, and who should I find, but my old friend Cameron!

Opening the door, Cameron looked wide-eyed at my lobster, with his claws all flayed back ready for battle. (Chip is very protective.)

"What you gonna do with that Lobster, Mr. Scott?"

"I plan to eat him!" I told him.

"You're going to EAT him?" Cameron asked, bug-eyed.

"Yes, I think he'll be delicious... So, what can I do for you Cameron?"

Cameron thought for a moment, trying to remember why he was burning a hole in my doorbell only seconds before. "Oh yeah. Can I come in and make some tin soldiers?"

"No, Cameron. It's my dinnertime," I told him, "I will see you tomorrow."

And so I shut the door on dear little Cameron, and proceeded to make my supper:

Lobster Pasta

1 large fresh lobster
3 tablespoons butter
1 large onion, chopped
1/2 red pepper, chopped
3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 can diced tomatoes
4 tablespoons olive oil
4 teaspoons salt
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon (optional)
1 cup heavy cream (or half-and-half for a lighter fare)
1 package of dried angel hair pasta
1 tablespoon butter
1 clove garlic
1 bunch fresh Italian parsley, chopped

  1. Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Add the lobster and cook for 6 to 8 minutes, until bright red.
  2. As soon as the lobster starts cooking, melt 3 tablespoons of butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the red pepper, onion and 3 cloves of garlic. Cook and stir just to release the aroma. Do not let them brown.
  3. When the lobster comes out of the pot, place it on a cutting board. Remove the body cavity, saving the claw and tail meat. Place the meat into the skillet with the red pepper, onion and garlic. Cook for about 3 minutes.
  4. With the hot water from the lobster, add a little salt, and place the pasta in the water to boil.
  5. Add the tomatoes to the skillet and bring to a boil. Add the olive oil, salt, pepper, and cinnamon. Cook, stirring constantly for 5 to 7 minutes. Slowly pour in the cream, stirring constantly. The sauce will become a nice pink color, bubbling gently. Turn down the heat to medium-low and keep warm until pasta is cooked.
  6. Drain the pasta and place on a large serving plate. Stir in the remaining butter and garlic. Pour the sauce over the pasta and arrange the lobster meat onto the center. Sprinkle generously with the parsley and serve.

Serves 4.

So, the lobster was delicious, but now I'm lonely again. (frown)


1 comment:

Chuck said...

That's hilarious. Have you considered a potbellied pig? Them's good eatin'.

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